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Step back from the judgement...step back from the judgement.

Our child attends a Catholic Montessori school and trust me, IVF, gay rights, whatever are not part of the day to day curriculum. In fact, not part of the curriculum at all.

The curriculum is about nurturing a questioning, cooperative life longer learner. In fact, a Montessori educator would ask a child to question any "received truth" belief.

The church is a huge, ancient institution. It is a culture as much as a religion. You have to separate the two. The Church has a consistent view on the relationship between God, Man and reproduction. It also has a consistent view on the need for charity and forgiveness. As a Catholic, I chose to focus on the latter and not the former. Being religious doesn't mean you are stupid or all accepting...it means you chose faith.


Wow, your words are exactly what I needed to read this evening. After years of struggle, I underwent IVF, and now have 3 year old twins. To hear the Catholic church's view on it makes me so incredibly angry. Yes, I was raised Catholic, but this is the last straw. We will be moving to a religion that doesn't continually preach hatred and judgment of others.


I was raised Catholic myself and I wouldn't send my boys to Catholic school. I hope you find a great school!



You probably wouldn't have been able to send Sweet Pea to the Catholic school anyway, since I am assuming that Sweet Pea was never baptised in the Catholic church.  Some schools even require the family to attend weekly Sunday Mass.  So don't sweat it too much.

Did you try Chicago's urbanbaby? Our urbanbaby has loads of info, from other mothers who have gone through or are going throught the preschool drama.

I am a alumna of Montessori and loved it.  My husband wnated our son to attend a yeshiva.  It turned out that the early childhood director of our son's preschool had Montessori training and had adapted the classrooms to a  pseudo Mostessori feel.  Which I suppose was the best compromise for us. 

Good luck!


My husband and I are both lapsed Catholics; our younger son will be going to a Catholic school next year. It was a hard decision for us, because there is so much Catholic doctrine that is the exact opposite of what we believe, but one thing we realized was this: not everyone in the world sees things the way we do. Last year our older son went to a very nice Montessori school and while he wasn't taught about God or religion, his classmates were very very wealthy and he was learning all about the virtues of private planes and vacation homes and weekly trips to the toy store. Those things don't fit in our belief system either.

I think that because we are raising our sons without religion we are having to work very hard to articulate what we DO believe in, and I am hopeful that if I do a good job at that, my sons will listen and respect life in all its forms--AND respect other people's beliefs as well.

(Coincidentally, I'm watching the episode of Sex and the City where Carrie catches Mr Big going to church with his mother . . . )


Religion is always such a hard topic to get in to so I normally stay away from it.

I'm Catholic and went thru Catholic school systems for years and years. But I've managed to upset every single rule that the Catholic Church like on contraceptions, and on sex. And without guilt, I still consider myself as a good person, and raise my children knowing that as long as they are not hurting anyone around them including themselves then so be it. So why stay Catholic? I believe that there is a God, and I happen to be born in that religion. I don't have to go around trying to find a religion that fits me.

In all fairness to all religions, each one has its own beliefs that will somehow trigger some of us negatively.

Both my kids went to a Christian Preschool, and as beautiful as the teachings are - some people has a way of making that Church look bad too. I've never seen so many judgemental group of parents in my life where they'll shun you away and make you inferior just because you are something else than their religion.

Sweet Pea is God's gift to the world. :-)

Good Luck in your search.


raised catholic and sent through the catholic school system I can say for certain that I will NEVER send my daughter to a catholic school.
for many reasons, too many to list.
But IVF? can they stoop any lower?
good luck finding the right school for sweet pea,
we are currently in the same boat.


I am delurking to say how sad (and frustrating) it is that the church takes this approach. There is so much about the Catholic church that I simply do not understand at all. I wish more people would raise and discuss these issues instead of saying, "Well, I don't agree with the church on that, but I was raised Catholic..."


I was raised Catholic myself, and everytime they issue some sort of stupid edict like this one, I become more and more proud of the fact that I shed Catholocism as quickly as I could. My brain just doesn't allow me to swallow all the garbage that comes out of the Vatican.

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