Like a lot of bigger cities, getting into preschool is kind of a competitive sport. I thought I'd found a decent option - I really like the Montessori approach, especially for younger kids. Most of the Montessori schools here have long wait lists. At the school I really love, we are currently 16th on the girl waitlist for the parent/toddler program. Getting into the parent/toddler program at many schools guarantees you a spot in preschool. Obviously, we're not getting in this year.
I ran across another Montessori school in my research that goes through 3rd grade. The only catch is that the school is Catholic. I'd sort of decided it was no big deal since Daddy-O was raised Catholic (kind of). His mom is Catholic. Even though I'm sometimes skeptical of organized religion, I figured if the school was good and the teachers cared about Sweet Pea, it wouldn't be that different from any other school.
Since I'm not Catholic, I hadn't really thought about the church's position on IVF. Since I believe I'm a good mother and a good person, I hadn't really thought about how the Catholic school system might feel about my child. My child, the love of my life. My child, the life I wanted to bring into this world more than anything. My child, a person, not a personification of evil.
I read how the church feels about IVF:
In summary, the Catholic Church condemns as gravely evil acts, both IVF in and of itself, and stem cell research performed on IVF embryos.
Sweet Pea won't be going to Catholic school. Daddy-O sort of rolled his eyes when I told him about this. I think he feels, like many Catholics friends of ours probably do, that what the Vatican says isn't necessarily the feeling that we'd get from the parents and faculty of a particular Catholic school. We have a lot of Catholic friends who I know don't think we're evil or that Sweet Pea is evil.
I don't care. Like most parents, I have no interest in putting my daughter into a situation where she feels inferior.
The Catholic church says that she was born of an evil act. That's a strong enough statement that I just can't get over it.
We didn't destroy any embryos. We didn't have a lot of other options. We had a beautiful daughter who we love with everything we have. We are good parents trying to raise a good person. Isn't that the important part?
It is so hard for me to understand the hate that goes into a statement like the one from the Church.
I imagine someday I'll tell Sweet Pea how she was conceived. Hopefully, by then people will be more accepting and less judgmental.